Being snookered by flu doesn’t stop South West Devon Lib Dem Propsective Parliamentary Candidate Anna Pascoe for long. With a big blanket and a bit of sleep she’s back in the business of sorting out residents’ issues, highlight anti-social behaviour, and working against the Ivybridge incinerator (and taking the occasional sup of hot chocolate). And the moral of the story? Well, let’s just say ‘Mark Selby’, for now. Take it away Anna… Monday January 11 The first, and very welcome, snow-free week of the campaigning new year began with a busy day at work at the hotel. While the morning heralded the fairly pleasant task of meeting with the wine merchants to discuss introducing some more organic wines onto our list, by the afternoon it was a case of...

Saturday:Conservatory Leader, Mr Balloon, has admitted that he’s not up to running a country at war and will be having to go begging to Captain Clegg and whichever unlucky troglodyte ends up in Mr Frown’s shoes as leader of the THIRD party after the election annihilates the Hard Labour Government.Yes LUCKY us! We have been privileged to be addressed by the Conservatory Cowardy Custard in waiting, and he’s broken the SHOCKING news that he’s going to start campaigning for the 2010 General Election. Like he’s been doing since it was the 2007 General Election.Let the Lovebombing Commence or “Fly My Pretties” as Mr Balloon almost certainly wouldn’t put it unless he thought he could get away with it.By a curious twist of completely making it up, I have here for you the text of...

In this age of austerity selecting a good book to read over the Christmas recess is both value for money as well as virtuous. This selection of books is mainly ones published since the summer with the addition of a few golden oldies.The Foreign Office is rather sensitive about diplomats writing “kiss and tell” books. Our former ambassador in Washington during the Blair Years was Sir Christopher Meyer, and in his book DC Confidential (2005), he criticised the whole Blairite approach to foreign policy and the special relationship. Now in Getting Our Way 500 Years of Adventure and Intrigue : The Inside Story of British Diplomacy, Meyer takes nine episodes in British diplomatic history and considers them against the three pillars of our national interest – security, prosperity and...

ToryDiary: Liam Fox wants to pull British forces out of Germany as part of a Tory defence "revolution"Also on ToryDiary: William Hague accuses Brown over deal with France on EU jobs which will sell out the City of LondonBrooks Newmark MP on Platform: The Government must re-introduce cervical screening for twenty-year-olds in England Seats and Candidates: John Maples declares re-opening of candidates list a "success"Local Government: Mystery shopping the Tower Hamlets way Calderdale councillor defects to the Conservatives WATCH: The Spectator's Fraser Nelson reviews the political weekDavid Curry defends his expenses claims... "The Conservative MP who quit as chairman of Parliament's anti-sleaze committee after allegations that he misused expenses has described the claims against him as...

I'm down with the flu and not at my best, however, I do want to comment on the result of the Glasgow North-East by-election.If you look at ukpollingreport, you will see since 1997, Labour has polled fewer votes at each subsequent election, although during this time Michael Martin was standing as Speaker. In 1997 Labour polled 22534 votes. In 2001, 16053 votes. In 2005, 15153 votes. In the by-election, Labour polled 12231 votes. There has been a boundary change, but in a solid Labour area, this has not made any difference. What we see here, is election after election, Labour voters are not voting for other parties, instead they are staying at home. If you look into data in other constituencies you will see the same trend. This is why Labour MPs with majorities under around 8000 are...

Earlier I blogged on the decision by the Raindance Film Festival to show the AIDS denialist documentary ‘House of Numbers’ and the endorsement given to it by the festival through Xavier Rashid and Elliot Grove, the festival’s founder. Since then I have been in contact with Mr Grove and presented to him evidence of the harm the ideas behind ‘House of Numbers’ have caused and argued that its promotion risks further harm.  Mr Grove has agreed to allow me to publish the following, unedited, statement from him: I chose and agreed to play House of Numbers for three reasons, all of which fit the Raindance Film Festival criteria: - debut filmmaker - quality filmmaking - an extreme message which I decided after hours of research and debate with my team, deserved to...

I have exclusively obtained a copy of Gordon Browns speech to the Labour conference, which I publish below. It is the copy sent from Gordons script team, but has yet to be signed off on by Peter Mandelson, so small changes may occur when delivered at the conference and Mandy's discretion.Stage and personal directions for Gordon are marked in [brackets].--[walk to podium, smile]Welcome[If standing ovation persists, throw both arms in the air and scream “YEAH, YEAH” like a rockstar would; if standing ovation does not persist look into camera with a serious look on your face]I am here today as leader of our party and as Prime Minister to set out where I think we are and what we will do in this next year running up to the General Election. But before I do, I would like to take this...

A second day with Rutland's most popular fictional peer.TuesdayLunch at my club with my old friend Tinchy Stryder. Following his success in what my more hep acquaintances call “the hit parade”, he has more than once sought my advice on the investment of his new-found riches. I have, for instance, been able to point him in the direction of a Good Thing in Rutland Railway Consols.Today he informs me that he is determined to invest in a Liberal Democrat MP, but cannot make up his mind which. Whom would I recommend?We run through the possibilities: Alan Beith? “I fear you may not be quite His Sort of Thing.” Hazel Grove? A lovely girl, but perhaps a little too racy for the staid Tinchy. Mark Oaten? I have to explain certain delicate matters to an incredulous Stryder – several...

Normally I do not post his lordship's diary until Liberator has been mailed to subscribers. As most subscribers will be collecting their copy from the magazine's stall at Bournemouth I shall be posting his latest thoughts over this weekend.MondayThis summer has been dominated by talk of “swine flu”. The wireless news reports have come thick and, indeed, fast: a woman in Biggleswade has a sore throat; a schoolgirl in Kendal is feeling a bit under the weather; a man in Dingwall has stayed in bed and not gone to work, but hopes to get up later because there is a film on Channel 4 he would like to see.Physicians have advocated various cures or palliatives: some swear by this new Tamiflu; others cleave to the traditional standby of oinkment.One controversy has been the advisability or...

Are you a young person looking to have a good time? Perhaps you know or just know of some young people who enjoy controlled fun – it doesn’t really matter to be perfectly honest. All that matters is that you’re keen to attend a gathering that celebrates the launch of a groovy new computer operating system and don’t have violent tendencies or Swine Flu. Yes, it’s Windows 7 and Microsoft want to spread the word by marking its October release with a series of house parties across the UK. There are four party themes for you to choose from… PhotoPalooza Media Mania Setting up with Ease Family Friendly Fun Oooh, we can’t decide which one to go for – they all sound a little bit kerrazy-bonkers! Appplications to host an official Windows 7 party must be made online and...

ToryDiary: David Cameron planning "big cuts" in pay for ministers in a Tory Government Rupert Matthews on Platform: When it comes to the seemingly innocuous matter of recycling, we are now living in a tyrannical stateLocal Government: Lord Hanningfield: Devolve patient transport to the Town Hall Copeland Council calls in the inspectors Tim Montgomerie on CentreRight: Head of Politics within the BBC's Editorial Unit agrees that it is better to avoid giving the BNP any labelWATCH: Lord Mandelson "officially" rules out seeking a return to the Commons to become Labour leader Cameron weighs in to defend the NHS"David Cameron, the Conservative leader, has joined the campaign to defend the National Health Service, following protests in the United States at Barack Obama's healthcare reform...

He's Cuba's second most famous son, but when principal dancer Carlos Acosta brought the Royal Ballet home, there was a shock in store for Havana's classical dance loversAt a high window set in the baroque walls of Havana's National Ballet School, one of the great stars of dance wrings out his T-shirt so that the sweat pours like water on to the street below. From the expressions of some of those watching, you'd believe they wished they were showering beneath. Behind Carlos Acosta, on the rehearsal floor, his partner revolves slowly, as if caught by a breeze the rest of us simmering in the heat cannot feel. Tamara Rojo, mischievous, exquisite, is the Spanish ballerina who is Acosta's partner of choice."We understand each other culturally," Rojo tells me. "It's instinctive, and that makes...

You would think from the news that the BANKS were the most important things in the British Economy. And I’m afraid you would be RIGHT. The financial sector is far and away the largest contributor to Great Britain’s Gross Domestic Product; our exports of financial services in 2007 amounted to TWENTY-ONE billion pounds, almost a tenth of ALL exports and more than from adding together our other two big sellers (that’s food and drink: £10bn and, embarrassingly, arms sales: £7bn). Well now we’ve seen the results for the first half of the year for some of the BIGGEST BANKERS on the High Street. There are, as they say, winners and losers. And by “winners” this means the bankers and by losers this means us. Plus ça very much notes only no change. The...

This is a guest post by Frank FisherIf you're going to declare war on a corporation, you might as well pick on someone big, and at first glance David Davis has done just that with his Times attack on mooted Tory plans to scrap the NHS “spine” and store health data with Google. A spot of populist rabble rousing never hurts a backbencher's public profile, and with a target like Google matched to a lexicon of attack buzzwords like "privacy", "trust" and even "database", it's rabble rousing with a civil libs edge, and that's the flavour of the month. But a closer reading of a really quite finely detailed piece presents a much more nuanced and less confrontational picture.For one, Davis doesn't actually dismiss the idea of private companies handling confidential patient records at all; he...

Now that a few hours have passed since the sensational results in Norwich North were declared it is worth reflecting on the fortunes of each of the significant parties that contested the seat and what conclusions can be drawn. Conservative – Chloe Smith will enter Parliament as not only the youngest current MP (aged 27) but also the youngest ever Conservative woman to represent the party in the Commons. She grew up locally and attended a comprehensive school before graduating from York University. She is exactly the type of “new” Conservative face that David Cameron is keen to project and I have no doubt that she will play a prominent role in the run up to the next General Election, with appearances on Question Time and other frontline TV programmes. The result was better for the...

Tories' Chloe Smith clinches the seat in first electoral test since expenses scandal rocked WestminsterDavid Cameron has inflicted a humiliating byelection defeat on Gordon Brown as the Conservatives beat Labour into second place in Norwich North.In the first electoral test since the MPs' expenses scandal rocked Westminster, the Tories' Chloe Smith won the Norfolk seat with a majority of 7,348 and, at the age of 27, becomes the youngest MP in the Commons.Labour's defeat, in a seat held comfortably by the party since 1997, is the fifth byelection blow Brown has suffered since he took over the reins at No 10.If the result was repeated across the country in a general election, the Tories would be swept to power with a Commons majority of 218, analysis by the Press Association news agency...

ToryDiary: Former Tory Chancellors warn of the need for spending cutsSeats and Candidates: Tories quietly hopeful of victory in Norwich NorthMatt Woods on Platform: How the Conservatives stand to gain from talking up the GreensParliament: Stephen Hammond complains that the Government delayed a major announcement on the railways until day two of the summer recessLocal Government:Should Councils encourage staff to work from home? Greens gain a council seat from the Conservatives in Brighton and Hove David T Breaker on CentreRight: If we are to ask our soldiers to be the best, then we must buy the best equipment - even if it's not BritishWATCH: Daniel Finkelstein of The Times on when by-elections can make a real difference to politicsChloe Smith poised to win Norwich North for the...

Live coverage from the count with Andrew Sparrow12.45pm: I've just had one of those very peculiar conversations with a Tory spin doctor who's in London. "Well, officially we're still saying it's very tight," he said. I could hear him smirking.It sounds as if David Cameron is about to renew his demand for an immediate general election.12.45pm: The agents have been summoned. The returning officer is about to give them the result.12.39pm: The broadcasters have been told that David Cameron is definitely coming up to Norwich to do a lap of victory at some point this afternoon.12.36pm: There's been speculation about Ukip beating the Greens. But the Tories tell me that the Greens are in fourth place, with Ukip behind them.12.30pm: Nick Robinson has written a jolly blog explaining how you should...

• Turnout was expected to be well down on the 2005 general election• A senior Tory source predicted a "tight finish" with just 40% of the electorate casting their voteGordon Brown is bracing himself for defeat in the Norwich North byelection as counting begins in what will be the first electoral test since the MPs expenses scandal rocked Westminster.The byelection in Norwich North, comfortably held by Labour since 1997, was caused by the resignation of Ian Gibson, who quit after Labour ruled that he would not be allowed to stand at the next election because he used parliamentary expenses to fund a flat which he subsequently sold at a discount to his daughter.The Tories were confident that their candidate, Chloe Smith, 27, will win today, though were nervous of comparisons with the...

After the results come out it's likely that all the parties will be declaring they've received a good result, well, all of them except Labour. It's always been a little bug bear of mine that politicians do this when hours before they were claiming they were going to win they still feel able to justify how halving their vote was a great victory in the circumstances.Anyway, as my tiny contribution against this tendency I thought I'd lay out what I think would be a good or bad result for the parties in Norwich North. Feel free to disagree - but only before the final result comes out!The Conservatives:Probably the simplest to judge. For the Tories a win is a good result, anything else will be gutting for them. I don't necessarily think it matters how convincing the majority is but second...

Tory candidate expected to win in poll triggered by resignation of MP caught up in expenses scandalGordon Brown is bracing himself for electoral defeat as polls opened today in the Norwich North byelection.Labour has held the seat comfortably since 1997 but the party is expected to pay a heavy price for the MPs' expenses controversy in the first Westminster byelection since the Commons was rocked by the scandal.David Cameron is due to visit the constituency for the sixth time this morning, giving a final boost to a campaign seen by Conservative headquarters as an important test of the party's ability to withstand a Labour attack based on a "Tory cuts" message.Unusually, the votes will be counted tomorrow rather than at the close of the polls this evening, partly because staffing a daytime...

Almost there now. The Labour candidate has reportedly gone down with swine flu, and I do hope he gets better soon. I feel ten years younger than I did at the start of the campaign and have enjoyed it enormously. Two nights ago the BBC Look East programme broadcast a live "Candidates debate" from which I was excluded, and which may have a major effect on the result. The four "Main parties" were included - NuLab, Con, LibDem and Green. The BBC is desperate to shoehorn an outraged public opinion back into support for political parties. They are certainly making it as difficult as possible for independents to campaign. The BBC also lied to me in that they said that the debate would be between the "main four" parties, but there would be a short "package" on me and on the UKIP...

2 Big Stories Health Secretary Andy Burnham has attempted to regain the initiative after Monday’s criticisms with the announcement of a pandemic flu service by the end of the week. Health Secretary Andy Burnham said the phone and website service will be able to provide flu diagnosis and access to drugs without the need to go to GPs. He also defended the government against claims from opposition parties that the service was a month late. He said the government had wanted to wait until the health service was under intense pressure before acting. Meanwhile the MoD, under attack for the provision of equipment for soldiers in Afghanistan, has been accused of wasting millions of public money: The National Audit Office said £155m of spending on radio systems used in Afghanistan could not...

ToryDiary: A Conservative Government would scrap the Financial Services AuthorityHoward Flight on Platform: The Conservatives must bravely approach the General Election with a credible plan to cut back Labour’s unrealistic borrowing requirementsSeats and Candidates: Diary of a PPC: Birmingham Northfield's Keely Huxtable reports on a week in the life of a twenty-something PPC with a one-year-old baby The ConHome coach hits the campaign trail in Norwich North Local Government: £500 million wasted in Birmingham job creation schemesWATCH: George Osborne tells Andrew Marr about Conservative plans to abolish the Financial Services Authority Mandelson seeks to outflank the Conservatives on Defence spending..."The business secretary said that Labour would seek to protect defence spending if...

In the 1990s, when credit was cheap, house prices were rising and jobs were easy to come by, a 33-year-old women called Bridget Jones bumbled into our lives.A modern-day Jane Austen character in tummy-control knickers, she was neurotic about the amount she smoked, drank and ate. Her main priority was to get a boyfriend. And she set back feminism four decades.But there was something lovable and funny about her. Helen Fielding, her creator, is a sharp, social satirist and Bridget captured the zeitgeist. She embodied a certain kind of youngish, ladetteish woman and we indulged her. Now she is to make a comeback.There is a musical in the offing and Working Title announced last week that it is developing a third film, likely to be based on the weekly newspaper columns that Fielding wrote in...

.This will save your child's life - but shorten your husband'sAs swine flu fears sweep across Britain, nauseating middle class parents have found a new way to imagine they are yet again in control of another public health scare. However, efforts by Britain's mums to look superior in the face of expert scientists advising against fads and bullshit ideas are being undermined by the nation's Dads hovering in the garden throughout and drinking too much beer in the garden.A 'swine flu' party and barbecue in Wimbledon hosted by Ffion Sullivan on Sunday was derailed after Tom Davies, wife of Maria, brought a crate of Kronenbourg despite a no alcohol request. The men soon consumed the strong fizzy lager and spent the afternoon knocking plastic cricket balls over the fence and onto the salad...

Synopsis.It is 2010 and Great Britain is the grip of a deadly swine flu epidemic. Industry has ground to a halt, the economy is in collapse, and the NHS is unable to cope.But how did it come to this? Roll back to 2008. The British Government is in meltdown, poll ratings are through the floor, the Prime Minister is deeply unpopular. One critical piece of legislation need to be ratified in order to satisfy a secret cabal within the government. A cabal whose origins stretch back deep into the Third Reich. The legislation would see Great Britain become part of a Federal Socialist European State but events elsewhere delay ratification in Westminster. There is a danger that a general election, which the ruling party would be resoundingly defeated would precede ratification. With opposition...

Health secretary Andy Burnham to make Commons statement on changes to way outbreaks are managedThe government is due to announce a major change in its handling of swine flu outbreaks today, with the daily recording and reporting of cases expected to be abandoned because of the increasingly rapid spread of the virus.The health secretary, Andy Burnham, is due to make a statement on swine flu in the House of Commons just after midday. With the number of cases confirmed by laboratory tests set to exceed 7,000 today, it is likely that the policy of trying to contain the H1N1 virus may be abandoned in favour of "outbreak management".In swine flu hotspots such as London, the West Midlands and parts of Scotland, which have already moved to the outbreak management phase, diagnosis of the virus is...

Throwing "swine flu parties" in an attempt to get immunity against the virus while it is a fairly mild form is not a good idea, doctors say. Reports have emerged of people intentionally mixing with friends who have flu. Their reasoning is that it is best to be infected before the winter when the virus could become more deadly. But public health expert Dr Richard Jarvis said such behaviour could undermine the fight against swine flu. He also stressed while it was a mild flu, people would still be putting their health and the health of their children at risk. Dr Jarvis, chairman of the British Medical Association's public health committee, has been working for the Health Protection Agency in the north west to help test, diagnose and treat people who have got swine flu. He said: "I have...

The NHS must not be raided to bail out the mess created by bankers and politicians, a doctors' leader...